Advent Week Two: Peace

Advent Wreath Week Two

"The God of peace grant us a quiet night and a perfect end. Amen."


I sat here in my living room Sunday night late into the evening on a lovely eve of Advent Week two. I was filled with peace and a sense of calmness. I wrote in my journal and I just sat in the glow of the many lit candles and the decorated tree. I stared into the dark and into the light, back and forth, back and forth. 


I love the night. I love the solitude and the silence. I love that time seems to slow down and I feel like I have time to breath and am at peace at the very last. The night is my down time, it is the time when I reflect on the day and all that I have learned and been part of. 


Tonight I sit here thinking how amazing it is that a group of young people this (Monday) evening at Youth Group made 56 handmade Christmas Cards for our friends at the Kamloops Seniors Village. How amazing is that? For two hours we worked on this project and there was a deep calmness within the group and within the space. God was there with us.


I am waiting, not so patiently, to light all the candles in the Advent Wreath. Advent is about expectant waiting and yet I so much want to be able to light all five candles. As I wait this Advent season I will be practicing patience - all good things will come and the celebration will be beautiful!


As I prepare for bed I remember a line from our Evening Prayer Service: 

"Preserve us, O God, waking, 

and guard us sleeping; 

that awake we may watch with Christ, 

and asleep we may rest in peace." 

*Quotes from Eucharistic Prayers, Services of the Word and Night Prayers: Supplementary to the Book of Alternative Services. ABC Publishing. Online here page 46.

Advent Week One: Hope

Advent Candles - Week One

The season of Advent is here and for that I am grateful. In the church the season of Advent is the four weeks before Christmas, before we celebrate the birth of Jesus. And in this season we get to wait. We are given permission to take a big breathe, sit and wait. To slow down and live in the in-between place. The place where we don't rush around with the rest of the society. The place where we don't get ahead of ourselves in celebration. 

We are filled with expectant waiting, like Mary waited for the birth of her babe. And hopeful anticipation because we know the celebration time will come.

For me Advent falls at the time when my academic schedule slows down. I take the time to rest, to relax, to pray, to be present with God. And I hold on to this time of waiting, this time when I don't have to get lost of the busyness of every day. 

A good friend of mine posted on Facebook that her Advent Mantra is going to be: "Slow is faster. Less is more." Wise words I think... I just might be borrowing them over these coming weeks. 

Take the time to slow down, to open you eyes, and listen to the Spirit's voice this Advent season. 

A Full Soul

The best feeling ever is having a full soul. I can't even describe the feeling in detail. I don't know if anyone can. How do you describe having a full soul? It's a good feeling. It's a full feeling. More peaceful. More calm. More focused. Happier. Ready for what's to come next. 

My soul is full. My soul is full because of community, worship, silence, friendship, laughter, scripture, song, and being fed with Holy food. I spent today with members of the Cathedral community for our Discernment Day. It was a good day, it was a full day, it was a fun day. Tonight I went to the Cathedral's "Holy Table, Holy Word" service. A service of meditation, chant, prayer, holy words and silence. As part of the service we had twenty solid minutes of blissful silence. It's been months since I've been fed in this way. It's been months since I've sat in silence. And hearing some of the words I share so often with the young people I work with (breath in love, breath out fear) was exactly what I needed. There's something different about hearing the words, about receiving them. Giving them to and sharing them with others is great and an honor but I was reminded tonight that I also need to receive them. 

And so this week I will breath in the love of God and breath out fear. I will breath in the love of God and breath out anxiety. I will breath in the love of God and breath out stress. I will breath in the love of God and breath out fear. This week I will strive to be present with God.

A full soul, it's a good thing. It will keep me going through the next week of classes. It will keep me nourished through my moments doubt, frustration, stress, exhaustion and panic. My soul is very full and it feels good. 

Fall Meeting of CoGS

At a time in the semester when I really should not have been going anywhere I took off to Toronto last weekend for the fall meeting of the Council of General Synod for the Anglican Church of Canada. And of course, I loved it. I loved every moment of it even though the evenings were late and the mornings were early. Our three days of meetings were very full from 8am Bible Study to 9pm Night Prayers.

CoGS 2010-2012 Group. Picture from anglican.ca 

I love the work and I love the people. I always learn tons and with this being our third meeting I was feeling more present and all the material didn't seem new and unknown. The relationships and conversations that take place sustain me, challenge me and support me. People are amazing.

There were many highlights, here are just a few:
- Conversations about Vision 2019 and the Marks of Mission. How do we encourage diocese to live these out so we get it beyond the National Church?
- Our "fireside" chat with the Primate and General Secretary. A lovely open conversation.
- Looking forward to General Synod 2013. This will be the first joint Anglican-Lutheran national meeting for the church and is what the Primate has described will be a "historic" day for the church.
- The Celebration of New Ministry: Welcoming Michael Thompson in as General Secretary. Alongside this was being asked to read the prayers of the people, it was a great honor and an important reminder to me that I love being part of leadership in liturgy! And as for our new General Secretary - well he is one amazing and faith filled and generous man.
- The Sacred Circle with our Aboriginal brothers and sisters. Hearing from Bishop Mark Macdonald that  we need to "build a church that the poor can afford". This is the second time I've heard this from Bishop Mark and I think it's something we all need to listen to. We heard the message that the Anglican Council of Indigenous People are at a point where it is time to stop asking and time to start doing. They are not going to wait any longer for the rest of the church. This was heard with great encouragement by the group but also great sadness that we have not been able to respond to the needs.

And of course so much more took place. On a personal level, I was asked to assist with the administration of Communion at our Sunday morning (early) service. At a time when I still would have been in bed I was reminded how very much I feel called to the sharing of the sacraments... I can't explain it. But I feel something that I don't always feel otherwise when assisting with that part of the service. And I love it.

Again, the people. I have so much appreciation for the conversations, time and encouragement that happens when we gather. It guides me and keeps me going. It also makes it so I don't want to leave.

So yes, I left at a point in the semester when I should have stayed home. But it has also renewed me, empowered me, energized me and encouraged me. It was good, so very good. It was also exhausting and intense requiring a full Tuesday of sleep. But it was worth it.

Only in Youth Ministry

My roommate and I got talking this past weekend about the upcoming youth group gathering on Monday night. This week the youth were challenged to build some kind of protection around an egg so that when dropped from the top of a ladder it had a chance of not breaking. We got talking before hand and eventually came up with the idea to make a large container of jello and have our egg dropped into it. And we carried out this crazy plan. Hours and hours of making jello... our fridge was filled with jello. This was possibly one of the craziest things I had ever agreed to carry out!

I spent Sunday night picturing it all going wrong. I could see the egg hitting the jello and bouncing onto the floor - reaching it's pending death. I was imagining jello and egg everywhere. I was filled with uncertainty and the many imaginative conclusions that I had come up with during the night. And the next day - my only thought (beyond this is crazy) was "how are we disposing of this massive amount of jello afterward?" (Still to be determined!)

What did I learn on Monday night? That the youth I work with are very good "protection" builders... none of their eggs broke. Okay, I probably allowed way too many supplies and way too much time - but we had fun in the building process! And the jello... all turned out well. The egg was surrounded by the jello and protected from breaking. It was the coolest thing ever and I am still amazed that it actually worked! The egg bounced and then was kind of suctioned in...

View the video here (and I promise, we didn't eat the jello afterwards!):

It's that time of the semester

Fall leaves at Thompson Rivers University

That time... that long waited for and yet completely dreaded time has come. Three more weeks of classes left and yet the work load is massive. Two short papers, one research paper, an in class write, multiple quizzes, books to read, exams to study for... there are three weeks before classes are over and exams begin. Three weeks until December is here - my month of rest and renewal. Three more papers until I'm that much more closer to being done. And yet all I want to do is put on a movie and rest. No reading, no composing, no analyzing, no thinking. I'm ready to sit and pause.

This is the time in the semester when I have to pull all the little pieces of energy and try to put it into the work that needs to be finished. This is when I need to say, "Melissa focus on what needs to be done." This is when I struggle to motivate myself. These are the weeks when cooking and baking finds time, my house stays clean, things become organized, and youth group ideas and plans don't stop appearing in my head. These are the weeks when all the things that don't need to be done at this moment get accomplished.

Three more weeks. Three more papers. I can do this.
Which means - I need to start that next paper...

In other news... the fall leaves were beautiful this year, especially on campus and on the sidewalk near the Cathedral. The trees are quickly becoming bare and we've had one snow fall already. Winter is coming!

Weekend Visitors

Taylor, Rhys and Aaron

For the first time since I moved back into Kamloops after spending the summer at Sorrento Centre Taylor, Rhys and Aaron came for a weekend sleepover. They are growing up, really quickly. It won't be long before they are all taller then me. It won't be long before they are all wiser then me. But, they will always be my youngest siblings even when they get to that age when I am no longer "cool" to hang out with!

We had a great weekend together. They came bowling with the youth group on Friday night, we spent Saturday painting, shopping and swimming and Sunday was filled with Church and lunch with Stewart.

Our painted creations!

Painting was the big task for the weekend. The basement suite I'm living in this year (which I love) has really bare walls. So, I picked up some paint and canvas and gave the kids the all important task of painting lovely pictures for my walls. And that is exactly what they did! On Friday night I told them that they needed to think of what they wanted to paint... "you can paint anything you want," I told them. Saturday morning Aaron said to me, "I can paint anything I want?" "Yep, anything you want," I said. After a few moments of thinking he turned to me and said, "I can paint the stairs?" Wait a minute!! He thought we were painting the walls! Am I ever glad that I didn't just put the paint on the table and go do something else... that would have been interesting!

Stewart came over for lunch and a visit on Sunday after church. It was wonderful to spend time with Stewart and the kids were really excited to see him. Stewart and I looked through some pictures of our childhood years - I must admit... we were pretty cute toddlers!

I did a lot of cooking with my crock pot over the weekend. My first roast beef in the crock pot turned out just amazing - so tender and delicious. And then Sunday morning I put sloppy joe stuff in before heading to church and we had an amazing lunch when we got home! I love my crock pot... it's amazing!

The weekend was great and I can't wait for the kids to come over again... although I have decided I'm never having triplets. Going from having responsibility for zero children to three children is exhausting!